It's been a month since Leo was born!
I can barely believe it!
I finally feel like I a getting into the mix of things, being a stay-at-home-Mom of a toddler and infant.
Just as I did in my last post, I'll be addressing the three areas that affect me most as a new Mom:
- Emotional Health
- Physical Health
- Mental Health
I am not shy about sharing my struggles and triumphs, as I may end up helping some other poor soul out there. Maybe there is someone who can relate to me and what I'm going to. If not, I am getting out my emotions and that, my friends, is cathartic for me.
Emotional Health
I still feel very emotional. I haven't cried much at all in the past three weeks. Maybe twice. Both times were as I was watching a movie. I have no idea if this is because of the pregnancy hormones still lingering in my system, but I am not a person who cries easily about non-realistic things.
I feel like I am able to think clearly and more logically than when Leo was first born. I can also attribute this to the course I am currently enrolled in online. It is a critical thinking course and I am in love with it.
I have noticed that I am very irritable because of the sleep deprivation, but that is to be expected. I hope that I will be able to control my temper more around everyone. I feel horrible for being curt with people, but I can't always control that. I act before I think a lot of the time. Less than I use to because I am more aware of that, but I still do it often.
Physical Health
I have yet to start strength training, but I am still healing from giving birth. I don't feel that I am up to that yet.
I have been walking a lot. A few times a week with one or both boys in tow. I usually carry Leo in the baby carrier on the front of me and Eli uses the child harness or he's in the stroller. I walked a little over a mile the other day and I am damn proud of that! I felt so much Sciatic pain about three-quarters of a mile into the walk, but I pushed through until I was home.
I've been eating a lot better. I had salad a few times. I love adding a lot of different elements to my salads. I have a sensitivity to hot and cold, so salad is not always friendly towards me. Here is a salad that I ate recently:
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| In this salad: baby romaine, sliced almonds, strawberries, shredded mild cheddar cheese, cucumber slices, sliced tomato, shredded, boiled chicken breasts, cranberries, and french dressing. |
I am not currently counting calories or tracking my weight. I am breastfeeding a lot, so that is burning some calories, but until I start actively exercising, I am not going to be tracking my calories at all.
I plan on starting an exercise routine once I get the okay from my primary care physician and obstetrician. I haven't had any chest pains since right before Leo was born, so I'd like to ease into a routine to prevent that, if possible, since the cause for my chest pains has never been determined.
Here are pictures of my body progress in the last three weeks:
Pictures Here
There isn't much to see here, but I haven't done anything but walk. What matters to me most is that I physically feel better and that is better than adding muscle definition or losing weight.
I almost forgot to add that I have healed well from giving birth. I haven't needed to use anything expect pantyliners for the past two weeks. I have basically stopped bleeding altogether and that makes me happy because blood makes me squeamish.
I see my OB in about a week and hopefully I will be cleared to have my surgery scheduled for my tubal ligation. I have been waiting for this surgery since I decided to have it for sure back in December. I wrote a little about my reasons for wanting this surgery as opposed to other methods of birth control in this post last month. If anyone is interested in more details about my decision, I can make a post about it and provide a lot of resources to support my decision.
Let me know in the comments below.
Mental Health
I have felt stable so far, but I feel like I am beginning to slip a little into my depression. Things outside of my control have happened over the last few weeks and while I feel optimistic for the most part, I sometimes feel pretty hopeless in my situation. I will not mention specifics because I am not the only one these problems affect.
I am patiently waiting for my appointment with mental health professionals and hopefully I will find a therapist that I am compatible with. I'm not ashamed to admit when I need help. I can't control my depression anymore than someone can control having cancer. It's the way my body functions. What I can control is what I do to prevent relapses and that means therapy and possibly considering medication, if needed at some point.
I would love to speak with someone who is removed from my life and can provide a prospective that someone on the inside may not have. I would like to feel happier and more energetic and able to cope with everything happening in my life.
I want to make sure I am giving myself every chance possible to be an amazing mother and if that means asking for help, hell yeah I'll do it!
That's it for now.
I hope you enjoyed this post.
Leave your comments down below.
